home of the enslaved and cowardly

It's been nice outside these days. Too nice. It must be a trap for all of those seasonal allergy sufferers. I, of course, have been graced with the wonderful lack of allergies. I would like to say that is because of my upbringing in a household led by a mother who doesn't believe in allergies. Except my mother doesn't like for me to tell people (even nonexistent Internet audiences) that she doesn't exactly not believe  in allergies. It's more of a I don't have any allergies (seasonal, food, latex, medicine, or whatever people are allergic to these days)  so my children must not have any allergies ergo they don't ever need to be tested for allergies . I am, of course, exaggerating about my mother's viewpoints. However, I have never been tested for allergies and continue to fill out all doctor's forms with a long string of "N/A's" when it comes to allergies, reactions to drugs, sexual activity (which is never awkward for me. Just kidding....

Your Flow's like Menopause. Gotta rhyme that shit, son. Apparently, stuck in a rut lately. Horoscopes have maybe affected my life (i.e. bias my interpretation of people's actions). Killed that beast with pink icicles... or however Hotel California  goes. Went to a "shady" location with roomie ( sans the Group) and ran into a 乖宝宝 there. I never expected to run into her there. Or find out that she had been three times prior to that. It was my first time there. Hanged out with her crowd for majority of the night, gothitonbyaguyandIdidn'tunderstandthesocialprotocolforthat, and I left. Cool story, bro. I also recently found out that not everyone talks to themselves. It has gotten to a point where roomie doesn't really even listen or ask what I'm muttering about. Should I stop? Can I even stop? You can't stop now. You'll never stop talking to me. I forbid it.  Okay. Guess not. Haha...sorry, not funny.

Happy, happy, haaapppy birthday to you, beloved unnie!~~~~ I have no regrets being your stan or having you as my ultimate bias. Today (for you) marks the anniversary of another year into the amazing life full of your wonderful and awesome accomplishments. Forever cheering for your beauty, voice, and -alwaysalways always  - your beautiful personality, I don't mind in the slightest loving and supporting you. Even though there's no one here reading this obviously , I wish you the best 29th birthday in the world and lots of love!~ Aw what the hell, this isn't twitter, but why not?  #Happy Birthday Bommie, #BOMratatata Hash tags make me a cool kid. Whatevs.

Spring Break was spent tentatively eating food. By the way, the little flap of tissue between the inside of your bottom lip and the lower gum line is a beautiful  place to have a canker sore (read: also, a delightful place to have a canker sore to rinse out with hot, salt water the night before a dentist appointment. Life, you are sensational). Anywho . I can't quite place why I feel so giddy. Is it because BOMMIE'S BIRTHDAY IS ON SATURDAY~~~~~~(that makes no sense, but tell that to my erratic fangirl heart)? Is it because a few well-written fanfictions have been updated (likely)? Perhaps, it is due to the insane amount of dried craisins I have consumed the past two nights (I don't even know anymore...). Or the fact that I have painted my fingernails a fiery and chippy  shade of Really Rio (read: glittery red). Who knows? All I know is that today was a beautiful day. And that I will be wearing my snakeskin print pants frequently. Yay.

Or you may be more used to "No pain, no gain." Not exactly a direct translation from ancient Greek, but close (read: cool) enough for me. I forgot to mention, lest I forget by next year, for this year's Valentine's Day, I received candy flowers from an anonymous source. When I came back from class, a bouquet made of rosebuds (two Hershey's kisses stacked flat end to flat end and secured in red saran wrap) on the ends of skewers covered in floral arranging tape was pinned to the bulletin board on my door. To this day, the sender has not revealed their identity (Apparently it wasn't Beth or any of my close-ish friends). Secretly (read: of course), I am very excited to receive anything for Valentine's Day (friendly gifts don't count if everyone gets them). Throughout middle school and high school, NO ONE, not even friends, sent me carnation deliveries or singing Valentines ("And none for Gretchen Wiener  me"). A laughable landmark in the hysteri...