Pink Martini and Wind-Up Bird

After work today, I suggested defeat and rediscovered the books that I had brought with me for this year. The Wind Up Bird Chronicles always renders me into a drowsy, lonely, cold lull (and I've noticed that I'm always reading it in a sunbeam. I must be a kitten. Or Bonbon). After a few chapters, I fell asleep, only to awake way after the sun had gone down. I was very much disoriented, and my first thought was to look for anyone at home - but no one responded to my pitiful "he-hello?" and my scaredy-cat face. I was lonely, but it was too late (and I wasn't that driven) to go surround myself with people.

So tonight has been dedicated to spaghetti, television, and Pink Martini with the usual suspects (a little bit of homesickness, Food Network, and Nick@Night).

Speculation/Thoughts brought on by Wind Up Bird - It's probably because of my age and inexperience, but I think I may want someone a little like Okada. Then again, I go through phases where I want anyone or anything. Someone who would miss zipping a dress up the smooth of my back if I were ever to leave him. But at this age, (not unlike a petit chien) I can only think that I would never leave him if I was darling to him. But if I didn't leave him, would I ever know that he memorized the print of my dress and the sweeping expanse of 嫩ness that is my back? Would he ever tell me what he noticed about me? Is that something you do? I want to find out, but Mother called to tell me that she had a foreboding dream about with me in someone's company, and that I should probably go through a time of satisfied solitude. I asked for specifics, but I was only told about the time - after returning from her father's funeral - she had a dream about a vicious driver and her dying car the night before her accident (when her life was saved by a very small margin) - which was Mom-speak for Listen to what I say because I know. And as a very superstitious gal (not the breaking-a-mirror-black-cat kind, just the gut and fingers feeling), I can only listen what ma mere tells me.

If anyone needs a summary about my hopes for the future: lyrics (except a boy for me and a girl for you).